Friday, October 15, 2010

I am going to Dethrone the Burger King

That cocky bastard has messed with the wrong fat kid.

If there is one thing on this earth that makes me want to hurl, it is orange cheese. Especially orange American cheese. Just typing the words makes my mouth all spitty.

I have been insatiably hungry today for some reason. I was not really satisfied with my breakfast this morning, and was really looking forward to lunch. For some strange reason, I wanted a whopper jr. This was no mere craving friends. It was a deep, definite, NEED for a whopper jr. - no lettuce, no pickles.

I ask you: Does that seem terribly difficult to deliver?

Apparently, because some total ASSHOLE decided to spoil my delicious whopper jr. by tainting it with their NASTY orange cheese. Sadly, I was unaware my whopper was tainted until I sat down at my desk and opened the wrapper. The RAGE bubbled up inside me like hot melty orange cheese hatred.

I realize this may not seem like a huge deal to you, but to me, orange cheese is MADDENING. There's not even a good reason for it to be orange! They COLOR it that way. Just gross.

Needless to say, being on Clomid has really made me an angry person. I seriously contemplated walking off the job and marching down to BK to smoosh someone's face in the disgusting atrocity they tried to pass off as a burger. Instead, I let my coworker eat it.

Maybe I'm in a mood because today would have been my last day here if this place didn't make it it's job to suck the life out of me. Maybe it's because today is the crazy preggo's last day before maternity leave. Maybe it's because I feel decidedly NOT knocked up.

Regardless of the reason, The BK should watch his back. That asshole is going down.

5 comments:

Emily said...

Ha ha ha ha. Thanks for the laugh!!

And sorry about your sandwich. I can completely understand the hatred for the orange cheese.

Hoping for our own Peanut said...

Too funny. I do not miss those Clomid crazy days. I would want to kiss my hubby all over and want to punch him in the face 2 seconds later. :)

kmb said...

you get em' girl!

Veronica said...

Hmmm, why is the cheese orange? The other day at work I decided I wanted a grilled cheese (which was delish, by the way!) and they actually asked me if I wanted orange or white cheese. I chose white. Not because I have immense hatred for orange cheese, I was just in the mood for white. However, would my sammich have tasted differently had I selected orange? Is there a difference in taste?

~Lauren~ said...

I've had issues with the king since he took away them cheesy tots...