McFatty Monday

Seeing as my girl Krista has to abandon McFatty Monday, I thought I would start up again - carry the torch so to speak. I've been following along with everyone's MM posts, just not posting one of my own.

So far, P90X is going along fine. I fell right back in, but I think I am going to repeat phase one because I was definitely phoning it in the first two weeks. I am slowly losing weight again, and I'm thinking about doing C25K with Mr. Joe. That makes three times I have mentioned running the C25K program and zero times I have actually done it. This time though guys - I mean business.

Another huge part of my weight loss - or lack thereof - is my eating habits. Both Mr. Joe and I suck at eating healthy. I have been trying to remedy that, but it's slow going. In my recent efforts to distract myself from babymaking, I have been becoming more domestic - I have cleaned and organized almost every closet in the house, our room is spotless and orderly (we live like adults now instead of frat boys!), I have taken over all laundry and cleaning detail, too. I have even been baking cookies, which those of you who know me irl know that it is no small feat to get me to create something that is edible. One time, I tried to make a peanut sauce and basically ended up eating peanut butter covered noodles for 3 days straight because I refuse to throw food out. EWWWW.

Anyway, I didn't mean to get off on a tangent, but my point is this: the next phase of my domestication is going to involve cooking dinner, and making lists and meal plans and all of that happy horseshit. Do any of you do this? What goes into planning out meals - and sticking to that plan? I'm looking for your expert McFatty advice. Hope everyone has a great week!

Here I Am!

Sorry for the brief hiatus there, I wasn't planning on taking a mini break. It just sorta happened that way. Here is an update on all things Mrs. Joe:

1) I still hate my job. Still looking for a new job - which basically, means I apply for anything and everything that is not call center. I think at this point I would clean elephant assholes if it paid relatively the same and rescued me from this place. (What would my title be? Assholetologist? I feel like I am pretty well qualified to perform that job.)

2) Still working on weight loss, just not as arduously as before. We've been really busy around here, seeing as it's busy time at my phone monkey job and at the movies and the house and yard are still in DESPERATE need of upgrading and improvement. I've lost motivation to workout after spending all of my time hating my job and busting my ass at my house. I definitely need to find that motivation again. Does anyone know how to find lost motivation?

3) Still not preggers, though I am taking Clomid this cycle to see what happens. This is my one and only Rx for it, so hopefully it does something. I have read alot about the symptoms and so far, I have had ZERO. At least, I think I have had zero. Every time I feel remotely warm I think to myself (in a loud inside-my-head voice), IS THIS A HOT FLASH? DOES ANYONE ELSE LOOK HOT?? HOW WILL I KNOW??? As a result I end up constantly gauging the internal thermostats of my coworkers and checking them with my own. They must think I'm queer.

4) Mr. Joe and I have started this new, radical idea for our marriage and finances. It's called Let One Person Take Care of the Bills Using Only One Joint Account. It's a relatively new concept in running a household. Instead of having three checking accounts (one for me, one for him, one for us), we now have just one account that we put all of our money in. I know it sounds crazy, right? This all stemmed from the constant overdraft fees I was accumulating (37 bucks each time friends) every time I neglected to move money into the right account or I forgot that a payment was coming out. Mr. Joe just about divorced me, but instead decided that he was taking away my debit card and giving me an allowance. So at 27 years of age, I have an allowance. It's not a set amount of money per week or anything, but basically whatever amount of cash Mr. Joe hands to me is my spending money until he has more cash for me. He hands me cash about once (sometimes twice!) a week. Then he pays all of the bills. This is working out splendidly because a) I don't have to do anything and b) magically, when I don't have my debit card, I end up with hundreds left over at the end of every pay period.

So that about covers it. I'll try to keep everyone updated more often. I know how you guys hang on my every word. I do have a funny story to share about a creepy stalker I have at the movies and an arm wrestling stalker that Mr. Joe has at his job.

McFatty Monday: Disney Edition

One of my favorite things about Monday (and probably my only favorite thing about Monday) is McFatty time. Here's a confession: I haven't gotten back into the swing of things since vacation. My boyfriend Tony Horton is probably missing me terribly. I'll be back soon baby, I promise!! The good news is that I haven't gained. The bad is that I stopped losing. But that will start up again soon, I'm sure. In the meantime, I would like to show you a little comparison of about a year: This was me in July 2009 -

I remember coming home from that trip and seeing myself for the first time as fat. UGH. I just hate this picture!!! here I am in the same shirt one year later though:

I know it's hard to see a difference, because we're sitting down, but there is a difference there. Still not 100%, but I'm working on it. After the last two weeks of P90X, I'm going to start on the Classic program. Anyone wanna join me (I'm talking to you Krista!!)

PS: I wish I was back in Disney!!!!

Hope everyone has a marv week. Be sure to read the fab McFatty Post by Metta this week.

McFatty Monday

This time next week, I will be in the happiest place on earth!!!
So, no McFatty Monday next week. Just to warn you ahead of time, here is a list of things I intend to eat on this trip:
1) A mint chocolate chip hot fudge sundae from the ice cream shop on main street (while watching wishes)
2) A SWEET CREAM CHEESE PRETZEL. Specifically from the lunching pad in front of Space Mountain. Holy crap on a cracker are they delicious!
3) A pulled pork sammich from sunset at the studios.
4) Popcorn (natch)
So the next McFatty Monday post will probably be a grumpy one, because I will most likely gain 20 pounds. Every single one will be worth it. I will not be thinking about my sucky job or queer ovaries for a whole week.
Well, that last one is a lie. Disney always make my uterus ache. I will definitely not be thinking of my sucky job though. NOTHING on the is earth can make me miss work!
So on to the McFatty part of my post: Blair posted about recommitting, which was funny because I told you all 'bout my little slip last week, and how you would make fun of me if I quit now. On Saturday, Mr. Joe and I went to a graduation party for his aunt and it was the first time in . . . well, ever that people commented on how I looked skinny. So much so that I didn't believe them. either that, or I must have looked worse than I thought I was before because I am just not seeing "skinny" when I look in the mirror. I see "thinner than before", but not skinny. Sometimes, I think that maybe I'm not seeing what other people see when they look at me, but then I look at pictures taken of me, and I see a bigger girl than what I see in the mirror. I wish I could borrow someone else's eyes for just 5 minutes so I would know what to believe. I realize that I am my worst critic, but it's one thing to say that, and another to know it.
Anyway, this post is turning all negative and depressing and in 5 DAYS I WILL BE IN SWEET CREAM CHEESE PRETZEL HEAVEN!!
I will also have 5 more days of P90X behind me, and will feel that much better about myself every day I complete. I don't have any pictures to post yet, but I will get Mr. Joe to take one before we leave and I'll throw it up here sometime this week. I hope everyone had a successful week!

McFatty Fail

Sorry I didn't post yesterday, I sorta fell off the wagon this weekend and was still hungover. This week was hard for me for some reason. Monday through Wednesday was my P90X recovery week, which means I didn't really work out that much - just walking Harry and running errands. Thursday I started phase 3, but then Friday I had to work both jobs and didn't get home from the movies until 12. I was not about to work out for an hour at 12. I still got a good workout in at the movies, because I was an usher and we have stadium seating, so my ass was up and down those stairs all night long. AND I wore a sports bra, so we can kinda count that right?
Saturday was okay, it was chest and back day, so there were allot of push ups - but I was doing them!! AND I would start on my toes (and then promptly go to my knees lol)! Then came Saturday night. Oh Saturday night. We went out for Mr. Joe's friend's birthday in the city.

Let me just pause to say this: I love Mr. Joe's friends. From the moment we met, they have accepted me as though I had been friends with them for years. Their girlfriends and wives have also fit seamlessly into my life. I feel very lucky to get along with those girls, because its rare for me to have close girlfriends. I really only have two friends from high school, and those two are like my sisters. So, to find such great friends in the girlfriends of my husband's friends is super lucky.

Except for Saturday night. My "friends" decided that I don't ever have enough fun and that I needed to let loose that night, and so I did. So much so that I apparently made plans to go on a little casino trip with everyone and I had no recollection of it until Mr. Joe was talking about it yesterday. As in, I planned an entire trip without consulting myself. I also drunk texted James' poor cousin (who was probably very tired and did not need to know that I wanted to be "bffs with her" at that very moment) and all of my siblings. I then proclaimed my belief in Jesus to Mr. Joe and that I want to take the clomid next cycle. It was a very busy night for drunk Mrs. Joe.
Hence, there was no P90Xing on Sunday. Or yesterday. I was still recovering. Today is a new day though, and I think I'm just going to start the week over next week, pretending that this week never happened. I didn't gain anything though, so that's good.
Blair had a nice question about summer vegetables, but sadly I don't have any recipes to share. My meals lately consist of Lean Cuisines and tuna fish. Would anyone like to come to my house and be my personal chef? I could be like Oprah, without the millions of dollars. You could come over and cook for me and we could hang out and then the next time I get drunk I can bother you at all hours of the night!!
Any takers?

McFatty Monday

It's my favorite day again!
Not really - but I figure if I keep saying it every week, one day I will come to love Monday as I love Saturdays. I have a feeling that might mean a change in career, but we'll keep working at it until then.
So here is my McFatty update: I am still at 150lbs after the plague, which gives me a pretty decent chance to make my 145 lbs goal by Florida, so I will maybe not look like a giant next to my tiny sister. Today is day 58 of P90X. I am already planning my next round after this one is finished. I will either do the classic version of P90X (there's a Classic, Lean and Doubles round. Lean is less lifting and weights and Doubles is double workouts for crazy people) or this new program that Beachbody is putting out, Turbofire. I think I just like the video they put together for it. The slow-mo gladiator music in infomercials always reels me in. It looks like it could be fun. Then I could do P90X again after that . . . and go on that way for the rest of my life. Or I could get really fat again and then start from scratch! OR . . .and how about this one - I could actually get KNOCKED UP and not be able to do crazy workouts for 9 months! I know crazy idea right?
Blair's post today made me hungry already. This is a good sign seeing as my appetite was gone when I was in the throes of the plague. I'm going to go eat breakfast now. Good luck everyone this week!

I have the plague.

Hello Internets! This post is mainly for my best friend Chrissy, who told me I was a blogging failure on Tuesday. This is odd, because I talk to her all day long on Gmail chat, so she knows everything that I could possible update on here already.

ANYWAY, I have the plague. I have had a crazy high fever and a stuffy nose and sore throat since Tuesday night. Yesterday I lefty work early, which I NEVER do. We only have PTO days here, no sick time, so I usually fight my illnesses while taking calls at work because I'll be damned if I'm going to spend my precious time away from work laying in bed sick at home. I had a really high fever that didn't break until this morning . . . and since I stopped hallucinating, I decided to come in to work for the second half of the day. Mr. Joe is not pleased. Oh well.

Probably what threw me over the edge is that I did P90X on Tuesday when I came home from work. I wasn't feeling that great, but it was my last day of resistance in month 2 and I just. wanted. to. finish.

Totally worth it in my opinion, because I am down to 150 as of today. Some of that loss might be from the plague, but I intend to keep it off. After this recovery week, I will take another picture - which I know you are all excited about AND I will be in the last month of P90X, which I'm finding hard to believe. I never stick with anything, and here I am, writing this blog all regular like and working out for an hour everyday for almost two months. I don't even know who I am anymore.

In TTC news, my fever/plague has totally messed up my chart. If I am following the same schedule that I had for the last two months, I would have ovulated today. I don't know because my temp was still up this morning. Not that it would matter anyway - there was no sexy time in the last 3 days. It's hard to feel sexy when you're dehydrated and choking on snot.

Our good friend Sean's father passed away on Tuesday. he had Alzheimer's and was sick for a really long time. I am terrified of going to the wake and funeral. It will be the first one since Mike died, and I don't know if I will be able to keep my cool. A few years ago, the father of one of the friends I grew up with died, and I was doing really well until I met her in the receiving line. I LOST MY SHIT. I felt awful for doing that to poor Jessica. That was before I knew what real loss felt like. Now, I don't know if I can be cool and keep it together.

Since this post is already really random, here is an adorable picture of my babies Harry (my German shepherd) and Wendy (the asshole cat):

Hopefully, I won't die from the plague and I'll see you all again soon!

Be kind to me internets

Happy McFatty Monday!

True to my word (and a tiny bit late), here are my day 39 of 90 photos. First lets remember day 1:

Now I wish I had Mr. Joe take my day 1 picture because I know you are expecting something amazing, and I think you will be disappointed because you can't really see the tubbiness in this picture. Trust me, there's more tubbiness than what you think you see. Lets examine the picture a little closer shall we?

I tried to blow it up to call attention to the fatter parts. It's hard to see, but trust me its there. Now onto day 39 (please be nice to me!):

Here I am from the side:

I know it looks like I'm sucking in. It might be because I am. Don't judge.

Here is proof that there is less ham and more muscle. And that I am a huge dork. The faces I am making in these pictures are ridiculous. I would crop my face out if I wasn't so lazy. It takes me too long to upload photos and I'm at work and don't feel like it.

So there it is. I don't see a huge difference, but I know its there. I'm upping my cardio so I burn off my fat by my Florida trip, which is in one month and 2 days officially. I'm hoping to be thinner so I don't look like such a moose next to my thin skinny minnie sister. Trust me, you'll see what I mean. I hope everyone had a great week, and that continues into this week!

McFatty Tuesday

I will do my update with a picture tomorrow. Sorry I missed yesterday, I know you were all holding your breath for my weekly weigh in :-) Has anyone else seen/heard of this?:

Apparently, you eat these cookies instead of a sensible meal and you lose weight. DOES ANYONE ELSE FIND THIS RIDICULOUS? I think this is the main problem with our society's collective weight. I'm sure you can lose weight just eating these cookies (100 bucks for a 14 day supply, no I am not kidding!), but this is not how you make actual changes. Weight and picture tomorrow, because I don't want to spill my weight without showing a picture to back it up.

McFatty Monday

Hello! Happy belated Mother's Day moms!
Did I say last week that this would be my 30 day mark on P90X? I'm too lazy to read my last post. If I did, then I was lying and I'm sorry. 30 days is this Thursday, so NEXT Monday I will show you my (hopefully) less flabby ass. Actually, what I am really hoping for out of P90X is less hammy arms and smaller boobs. There's only like one dimple in my ass, so I'm not as concerned about that as I am about my rack giving me black eyes when I run the 5K I signed up for in 2 weeks. AND if I get enough speed, will my hammy arms cause me to get lift and go airborne? I think It's possible people. Running is a dangerous sport. Hence, I have avoided it until now. If I stick with the P90X for two more weeks though, I might be ok. I have definitely noticed definition in my arms. There's something under all of that ham after all! On Friday, I did one push up ON MY TOES instead of my knees! I couldn't do any more than one, but that is ACTUAL PROOF that something is happening. Oh Tony Horton, if you can help me get rid of my hammy arms, I will love you for the rest of my life. Of course, I might love you forever anyway, 'cause you're so darn cute! I still haven't weighed myself, but I feel different. On Saturday, Mr. Joe and I went to his mother's cabin in Vermont to clean it up. We had SO MUCH to do up there.
I impressed Mr. Joe and his cousin because I was able to move alot of the heavy trees out of the way BY MYSELF! I can feel myself getting stronger.
On the way home, we stopped for dinner and it took everything I had not to eat the ice cream sundae that the table ordered. It looked AMAZING, but I resisted! I just keep telling myself that I will look and feel much batter on day 30 if I can just keep it up.
Thats all for now. I have pictures from VT that I'll post, in case anyone is interested in purchasing some land with a cute little cabin in Vermont.
Also: Please encourage Blair this week. She is doing a FABULOUS job!
Have a lovely week McFatties!!

I can push myself back up!

Happy Monday friends!

I didn't weigh myself again this week. I've been doing so well with P90X that I'm afraid if I don't see lower numbers that I'll get discouraged and stop. I'll weigh myself next Wednesday, because that will be day 30 and I'll take another picture and post it for all of the internets to see again.
Even though I don't have actual numbers to go off of, I can feel a difference. For one, I can do a girlie push up again. I know, it's pretty pathetic that I was unable to do one before. There was alot of hamminess on my arms then I care to admit. But now, after 3 rounds of kickass Yoga X, I can do 10 girlie push ups until I get tired! I also feel firmer. My arms feel the slightest bit tighter. Yesterday, I worked out in just a sports bra and shorts and I let one of my friends see me like that. All huge differences to me, and so I am excited about continuing.
I can't tell you how much fun I have while I'm doing the workouts. I LOVE this plan friends. I wish you could all come over my house and do it with me, but you'd probably be creeped out by my creepy basement gym. It's still just as difficult as it was on day one, but only because each day, I push myself to do something more. I wish I could be in the next infomercial!! And meet Tony Horton because seriously, for 50 -something year old, he is delicious.
Also delicious? Taco Bell. To answer Blair's question, I try really hard not to eat fast food, but sometimes I can't help myself. Taco Bell as their own "drive through diet" plan - and it's pretty good. The one place I try to avoid with my entire being is McDonald's because I am a sucker for Big Macs. Unless there is orange cheese on said Big Mac. Fast food melty orange cheese is the Soapscum Avenger's kryptonite.
Good luck this week everybody!

McFatty Monday

Happy Monday McFatties!

I am on day 11 of the P90X and I think it's going really well. It's actually a fun workout. Don't get me wrong - it's really hard! - but the variety of moves that they do and the really cheesy things that Tony Horton says makes the hour go by like nothing at all. It's only been 11 days, but I feel like I'm changing. I hope it's not all in my head. Mr. Joe's been keeping up with it too and so I think by the time we go to Florida we will be one HOTT (with two Ts!) couple. The toughest workouts to do are Yoga X and Legs & Back.
Yoga X was yesterday and reminded me of the time that I went out and partied one Friday night, and then the next morning I decided to go to Pilate's with my bestie Ronnie. About half way through the workout, while we were in some ridiculous pose where we bend over and look up, I hissed over to Ronnie "I think I'm still drunk!" and promptly fell over. Yesterday was much of the same, except this time I was sober. I never thought people could get so sweaty and out of breath by just bending! By the time I was done I was really gross looking.
Today is Legs & Back, and the 2nd hardest workout I have to do. The way I see it, when you work out your arms, it's not as bad because you can still get up and do things when you finish. Your arms are sore, but you can function without them (mostly). When you work your legs, it's really hard to move after. Especially if you have to walk up a long flight of stairs out of the basement where your "home gym" is. This workout has alot of pull ups in it too. I cannot do a pull up to save my life. Literally, if someone were holding a gun to my head demanding I do a pull up or be shot, I would be toast. You're allowed to use a chair to rest your legs on if you can't do it on your own, but pull ups are always done right after you bust your rear end working your legs so they're not much help. The majority of the time, I end up laughing at myself and have to pause the dvd. Laughter burns calories though, so I guess that's okay.
I didn't weigh myself this morning because I was getting a little upset with the numbers because they weren't really moving. Rather than start out my Monday in a bad mood (that would undoubtedly be added to today at work), I just decided to forgo it. My pants fit and I don't feel as hammy so that's good enough for me. I think I'll wait until next Monday to weigh in - I know you're all excited so stay tuned!!!

McFatty Monday - the one where I follow through on something

Happy Monday McFatties (please don't take offense, it's a term of endearment, I swear!)

So, last Tuesday I said that I was going to post a picture of my haminess so I would be motivated to stick with my plan. . . so since some of you (and Blair) have done it, here's mine:

Please pay no mind to the garbage behind me, the room we keep our mirror in is the guest/onedaynursery/putallofmybrother'sstuffinthere room and it's a disaster right now. I don't like how I look anymore. The other day, some high school friends posted old pictures on facebook from when we were all younger. Look how skinny I was then:

Don't you love my bangs? They started at the middle of my head. This was right after my bestie advised me that I needed to grow them out or I would never have a boyfriend ever. She changed my life with this advice.

Couch to 5k is going . . . ok. I need new running shoes because I feel like I am running barefoot. I also started P90X on Wednesday. Mr. Joe ordered it because his brother and cousins all did it and said it was awesome. So far, I have been pretty challenged by it. By challenged, I mean I wake up in the morning feeling like (p diddy?) I was hit by a truck and that I might have internal bleeding, but I'm taking that as a good sign. I like it better than the 30 day shred, because the trainer (Tony Horton) is not mean like Jillian. He's actually pretty cheesey, and I love cheese! There's like 12 workouts (I don't the actual number, but its more than 3) so I won't get bored and Mr. Joe is also doing it so we can motivate eachother. I also decided that I wasn't going to eat ice cream until our trip to Disney in June. I really wanted it on Saturday because it was such a crappy day and I could have used the pick me up, but I stayed strong because I imagined how good I will look in June if I could just make it until then. I'd like to say that that alone worked, but really it was because I was too sore to move off of the couch to go out and get it. Another bonus of P90X! The only down side of the video is on a few of them there's this blonde chick that I want to punch in the face. Other than that, I pretty confident I can stick with it for 90 days. I'm not sure if I will look like a model at the end of those 90 days, but at least I'm moving around after all of the weeks of looking for something to do!

Hope everyone has a great week!

McFatty Tuesday

Sorry to come late to the party, but my pesky job got in the way of blogging yesterday. Lame.

Not much to report, Blair looks awesome, and has an adorable baby to exercise with, where as I . . . look blah and have no cute baby to use as free weight. I have a cat, but she is not as um, cooperative as a baby. That's ok though, the baby and looking awesome will come.

But they will not come unless I get off my fat hammy ass and DO SOMETHING ALREADY!! I've been doing little things here and there, but nothing consistent. So when my skinny and fertile friend Melissa face booked me about running in a 5k at an amusement park near my house, I decided to bite the bullet and just say yes. Yes, I, Tubby Mc FatArms will be running in a 5k in May. Immediately after agreeing, I felt barfy over it, but the run is for a guy with cancer or something, and you can't say no to cancer! So I have approximately a month and a half to be ready for this thing. I am going to start my training today after work with the Couch to 5k workout. Wish me luck. Tomorrow, I will post a picture to hopefully motivate me to stick with it. Anyone else use this workout?

McFatty Monday

Please disregard any typos in this post, my keyboard may or may not be covered in green sugar crystals that may or may not have come from the green peeps that I maybe ate for breakfast. I am unable to confirm or deny it though, as I just woke up from an Easter candy coma.

He is risen!! Bring on the bunnies!!

Today is CD 2, so I have an extra 2 or 3 pounds of baggage from AF, so I'm still the same weight. I've been walking, but I think it's time to switch it up in order to lose more pounds before Florida. Last week, I decided that I absolutely CANNOT eat one more Lean Pocket. I almost vomit at the idea of eating another one. I just can't doing it anymore. That leaves me with a need for new lunch ideas. I need something quick and easy that I can grab and go to work with. Any quickie lunch ideas?

Mr. Joe is thinking of doing P90X and if he does, I think I will too. I still haven't found a Zumbaa class in my area, but thats mostly because I haven't really looked hard enough :-)

Hope everyone has a great week! Happy Monday!

McFatty Monday!

Happy Monday!

Firstly, Blair looks fantastic. I'm super impressed. I would show my own pictures, but I haven't really taken any good ones. You'll have to refer to my post about sin to see how far I've come. Since I'm dressed like a nun you can't really tell, but trust me, I look better than I did when I started. I added a ticker to my page that counts down to our family Disney trip (which was a request of my brother, who I will post about next week). I'm hoping to be bikini - ready for that trip. Or knocked up, but that goes without saying (I hope).


I've been walking with my work friend Sarah at lunch. While it doesn't change the fact that I still hate my job, it really helps me get rid of the homicidal feelings I have by the middle of the day. Our campus is actually very pretty and we're really surprised by how relaxed we feel by the time we're done. Also, it's an easy way of getting in a workout. I've been trying to walk Harry when I get home too. All in all, I'm just chugging along here.


Does anyone have low cal crock pot recipes that they've tried and liked? I think I might break out the crockpot this week. Please pray for Mr. Joe :-)


Hope everyone has a marvelous week!

I'm a rebel

No McFatty Monday today. Not because I gained or anything, there just hasn't been a change this week and I haven't really been focusing on weight loss. I'm still stalking the McFatties that I normally comment on though. At least SOMEONE can focus on weight loss.
Remember the "wet" burrito though? At least I didn't gain. Thank God for small favors.

Instead!!! I will tell you about my weekend!!!

Friday night I worked at the movies until 11 and then drove to the Super Walmart to stand in line for New Moon. Don't judge me.

Saturday, we went to a wedding. The priest talked about finding everyday things erotic. Those were his exact words. It made us all a little . . .uncomfortable. I tried really hard not to cry, but since my brother became ill, I have a really hard time in church. It's as though all of my thoughts turn to Mike. Then I have to try really hard not to cry and I end up looking like a GLASS CASE OF EMOTION ala Anchorman. Awesome.

I debated with myself about drinking. Could I be knocked up? Did we have sex in time? I CAN'T REMEMBER!!! I didn't really want to jeopardize it if I am KU, so I just sipped champagne for the toast. I probably wouldn't have drank anyway, since I drove, so it wasn't that big of a deal. The food was delicious, the cake was AMAZING. Mint chocolate chip cake. Ingenious!

I locked my keys in my car and had to call AAA to open my door. Mr. Joe was not pleased.

Sunday, we went to Marshall's to pick up Mr. Joe's check. We ate at D'Angelo's. I felt barfy, and immediately thought it was because we must have made a baby. Then the nausea went away and I told myself I was overreacting.

Today, I am at work and one of the girls that had a nervous breakdown has let slip that she is pregnant. Her baby daddy already has a daughter, who he owes ALOT of child support on. We are all sad that she is with this loser again. We hope that he ends up leaving her because she would be much better off without him. I know it sounds awful, but it's the truth. It's also why I am not green with envy right now.

That's all I have for today. I know it was super exciting stuff. You're welcome!

McFatty Monday

Happy Monday! (and if it really is a happy Monday for you, feel free to bypass this post because I am whiny and grumpy and complainy)

No real changes in my weight to report, so yay. I ate horribly last week because I'm stressed out. I started taking the birth control, even though I really don't want to. It seems counterproductive to my cause. So, I'm frustrated. Also: I HATE MY JOB. I really don't want to be a phone slave anymore. I hate this job more and more each day. I am a talented, intelligent individual. I have a BS degree in executive business management, which I earned on my own, while working full time and busting my ass, yet the most I do all day is tell people what their piddly 403b account balances are and argue about why they can't take their money out (here's a hint, because it's meant for retirement you turd!). TWO PEOPLE have had nervous breakdowns. Actual, legitimate nervous breakdowns. This is also a source of frustration. Do you ever feel like you are supposed to be doing something more with your life? I'm not sure exactly what is it I was created to do, but it sure as shit isn't this.

I hate my attitude lately. I wish I could stop feeling like I'm entitled to have a baby and an awesome job. I wish I could stop focusing on what I don't have. It's been very difficult for me to not be envious of other people. What's funny is that I recognize how I'm acting and feeling, but I can't change it. No matter how much I hate feeling that way, I can't stop myself from feeling like I should be more successful, thinner, fertile, happier - you name it. I want to be happy with what I have. I want to enjoy this time in my life - and for the most part, I do. I love my husband (when I get to see him). SEE WHAT I DID RIGHT THERE? MUST. STOP. COMPLAINING.
Any advice to not feeling so crappy? Anyone looking to hire a snarky, smart lady to do anything other than pick up the phone?

Everyone go congratulate Blair on her fantastic job so far! She's feeling so confident that she's thinking of rocking a bikini this summer. The rest of you also look awesome and are waaaaaaay more positive than me today. I think it goes without saying that I am totally jelly of you. And I hate it.

McFatty Monday!

Quick post, just because I want to be consistent: AF took her extra baggage with her and I'm back to my all time low weight of 148. Hooray!



On a serious note: if you don't read her, or haven't read her post today, please read Blair's PPD post and leave her some encouragement. I am in awe of her raw honesty. If I'm being honest, I thought PPD was just "the baby blues" up until I read this today. Who's the celebrity spokesperson for PPD? Is it Brooke Shields? I know there's someone - but I have never taken it as seriously as I did after reading Blair's post. I hope her writing reaches those that really need it!

McNochange Monday!

Happy Monday everyone!

It's ironic that Blair asked us about plateaus today, because I think that is where I am finding myself lately. The 2 pounds that showed up last week are still here this week. I am hoping that AF just brought 2 pounds of luggage and that she will take them back when she leaves. . . but the truth is this: in order to get down off of this plateau, I have to MOVE MY FAT HAMMY ASS OFF OF IT. I realize that some people get stuck at a certain number even though they are exercising and eating right and all the things you are supposed to do when you're dieting. Sadly, if this is you, I have no advice for you. Really I have no advice for anyone but myself, because telling someone to move their fat hammy ass is just plain mean and I wouldn't talk that way to nice people in the real world. You all seem like nice people, so I'm not talking to you.

I'm talking to myself, which means that I'm crazy. You've probably ascertained this by now.

I'm going to Florida in June and Hilton Head SC in August and I would really like it if I could look somewhat decent in summer clothing when we go on these trips, so I really need to get moving. Both literally and physically. This week, I promise you (well really myself, unless you really care that much) I will do some form of activity at least 3 times! This activity will not include walking from the living room to the kitchen to find something to eat every 15 minutes. My sister and I were supposed to go indoor rock climbing, but she keeps rescheduling, and I don't want to attempt something like that without a friend. I would hate to have the people I care about miss out on an opportunity to laugh at me. My main problem with actually exercising is that I'm a master procrastinator. Remember our fire? I finally bought a smoke detector last week. It's sitting on the counter now. One day we will put it up on the ceiling. That's just how we roll. I'm pretty sure I can work with this small goal though. We will see next Monday. Good luck to everyone this week!